Thursday, October 30, 2008

Rock The House Down.

YOU CAN GET AUNT TO GIVE YOU ANYTHING IN THE WORLD. She says she has no money. And then she says she hasn't got any change in the house because she has used all the cash to pay the suppliers. Of course she's lying to you. She's giving you a hard time to see how far you are willing to go, rolling yourself like a nyiur kering on the floor; all the time screaming your lungs out, arms and legs flailing like a drunken crab, cursing and swearing how come this whole world is so unfair to you. All you want in this whole wide world is three ringgit and the only person you can ask it from isn't gonna give it to you.
And so you cut a deal with God. Make Aunt give me the money and I'll be good for the rest of my life. Of course you're lying. Again. You know you're gonna run away when Grandma calls out to you to go to her with the rest of her budok nngaji to read your Qur'an. You know you are not going to follow Grandma to the masjid anymore because Cousin has just bought a TV set. You know you won't help Aunt round up her kambing because you have learnt to be shy to do that now that a pretty looking girl has just moved in next door and you don't want her to see you herding the kambing because that would be such a low down thing to do. You have made a lot of deals with God. So far you haven't kept your end of the bargain. And this is the reason why you hide yourself under Grandma each time there's a lightning. You know God is gonna get you, striking you with a lightning until you're as good as charcoal. God does that to people who don't keep their end of the bargain. But today is a bright day with sunshine and blue skies. You're safe for now to do all your yelling and cursing, rolling and crying, kicking and throwing things around the house.
But Aunt isn't giving in. Not this afternoon. She's in the room reading something, laughing and smiling as if you are a circus monkey that has eaten too much bananas that you have gone crazy in the head. But you can't stop now. You've gone this far trying to get her to give you the money. You've made a complete fool of yourself, in full view of Grandma's budok nngaji, reciting their Qur'ran on the verandah.
All the time Aunt is saying; polis! polis! tengok budok ni nggamok macam awang dicu. Mari tangkap dia masuk jel. You cry even more. And yell even louder. You're losing this game to Aunt in the most humiliating way and you know you've gotta do something different.
And so you run out of the house to collect a handful of stones and begin pelting the house as if possessed by some demon that has gotten into you to do this to Aunt and Grandma. You keep pelting, raining down the house with stones and sand. You see Grandma recites something to the sky as if asking God to do something fast. That got you kinda worried but you can't turn back now. You gotta win this game. Aunt stops reading to look at you from the window. She gives you a stern look but you know that look so well. So you stop. And go up the house to her room.
With three ringgit in hand, I race down on my bicycle to Kedai Cek Gaduh to buy the wallet that has the picture of a Hong Kong actress in bikini.

27 Comments:

Blogger mamasita said...

Alahai Bergen!Kenapa lah you tak jadi comedian!Kelakar sungguh cerita you!Sampai nak sakit perut ketawa!And you know?Ada familiar instances practised by many mums till today..yang bab nak panggil polis tu!haha..bab budak rolling and menjerit sampai nak cabut anak tekak tu is an eternal tactic practised till today!haha..

4:31 PM  
Blogger Pok Deng said...

One question, how old are you then? Why in the world you chose that wallet with a Hong Kong star wearing bikini?

Hoho.

4:48 PM  
Blogger bergen said...

Mamasita: I hope call-the-polis-tactic will still work years to come. Tapi mungkin tak kot. Maybe mothers akan kata 'stormtroopers! stormtrooper! mari zap budak ni'

Pok Deng: LOL young enough to be able to do the rolling and yelling on the floor, old enough to know about girls in bikini. (After having watched James Bong)

5:25 PM  
Blogger tokasid said...

Bergen:
I have a cousin who when his mom refused to his ways, will start rolling and screaming on the floor. Yes,he did the pelting too plus all the mencarut and maki hamun. Aunt threatened to call the polis and bengali potong kepala but he said: Pi panggey semua poleh ngan menggali dalam Aloq Staq ni orang tak heran". And he chased and pelted any adult who tried to pacify him.And he threw things he can get hold into the nearby bendang. He was 4 years old at that time. And once he ran to the pekan nat(pasar minggu) about 2 km away becoz his mom didn't to go to the pekan nat.

Sometimes after the tantrum he got what he wanted.Sometimes he got the cane for it.

Decades later I did my elective posting in Alor Star Hospital and stayed with them,again.He was in Form 5 by now and he was someone 'new'. No more the brutal chap. I asked him: "Adik Di, macamana hang boleh berubah totally ni?Dulu sikit punya pengganas ka?"
He answered with a smile: "Abang woi...la ni kami dah besaq dah.Takkan nak buat perangai macam dulul lagi,dak ka?"

When his son was around 3-4 years old, the son was also the 'pengganas' type. He scolded his son but we told him,he was exactly like that before and did he not change as he matures? He then toned down on his son.Now the son is a teenager and is also a totally changed person.

A question to you: what does awang dicu mean? I remember we use to call a friend awang dicu in the 70's but I do not know why.

About the wallet, I don't think its about the HongKong star.Its about her in bikini,right? Heh3....

5:31 PM  
Blogger bergen said...

Tokasid: He he, not only you a medical doctor, your psycho-analysis of the actress in bikini is a bull's eye! LOL

5:38 PM  
Blogger brighteyes said...

nice to read,brings back memories..

7:13 PM  
Blogger ubisetela said...

I have the same question with Tokasid, who is awang dicu?

8:55 PM  
Blogger bergen said...

Brighteyes: You did the same thing too? And bought the same wallet too? LOL.

Ubisetela / Tokasid: No, I don't know who this awang dicu guy is but people mentioned his name quite often. I'm not sure whether it's good or bad if people link him to you. But dicu to me sounds like a punch that misses the target - dicuung!

9:46 PM  
Blogger Kama At-Tarawis said...

Ya Rabbi Bergen! hudohnye peranga!LOL

10:28 PM  
Blogger bergen said...

Kama at-tarawis: In Trengganuspeak that would be; molek ke jenis peragai tu! he he

10:44 PM  
Anonymous gumbleed said...

nice story.

all those 'immature' attempts (shouting and stone pelting) in a desparate attempt to be 'mature' (bikini pix) ??

how ironic.....

11:40 PM  
Blogger bergen said...

Gumbleed: Mature. Immature. Ironic. I don't get it. he he

12:01 AM  
Blogger Queen Of The House said...

Okay, what DID you do with the wallet after getting it? Tak rasa malu ke bila keluarkan wallet dengan gambar actress in bikini tu?
(I'm still trying to imagine what the wallet looked like, LOL)

1:02 AM  
Anonymous A Mother said...

teruk betul!

5:56 AM  
Blogger A w a n g said...

hahaha, keda cik gaduhhhhhh...dulu awang penoh beli mainang kedai tuh masa sekoloh2...macang2 dia jual, kasut pun ada, lening ade ke dok agi keda tuh kat kuale dungun.

9:29 AM  
Blogger bergen said...

QOTH: The wallet - I had them in blue, brown, red. Different color comes with different actress in different bikinis. So I had to have all of them. he he

A Mother: What to do. Born like that. he he

Awang: Ada lagi, tapi barang dah banyak kurang. Mainang pun tak banyak. Kasut ada, semua made in China (melamine free). Kain ela, yang belang2 buat baju tidur ada. Beg sekolah ada tapi yang dah tak cool. Kalau beli lot tu buat 24 hour mamak bistro pun okay juga, tapi jenuh lah nak dapatkan patron kalau harga tak sama dengan kedai no 6 kat tanjung.

11:59 AM  
Blogger Fauziah Ismail said...

Salam Bergen
My mother still uses the call-the-polis tactic on my nephew after the call-the-benggali-roti routine didn't work because Danial didn't know who or what a benggali roti man is.
The benggali roti was my "Nightmare on Jalan Othman, PJ" when I was about five years old ... ohh yes, I threw tantrums when I was small ...

1:55 PM  
Blogger bergen said...

Fauziah Ismail: You used to live on Jalan Othman? What year? Which house?

2:55 PM  
Blogger Zabs said...

Salam Bergen,
Dulu semasa saya kecil, ada sorang kawan yang selalu berperangai gitu untuk nak dapatkan sesuatu. Bila dah besar sekarang, pernah jadi YB sepenggal untuk tempat kami.

3:52 PM  
Blogger zackzara said...

It's good to be able to recall back childhood memories in detail, and Sir, you have a great naughty but fun childhood, I may say..and smart too!

-zara-

11:00 PM  
Blogger bergen said...

Zackzara: Naughty yes. I'm not sure about smart he he

11:12 PM  
Blogger Fauziah Ismail said...

Salam Bergen
Mak said the house was opposite the Balai Islam. I don’t know if the Balai Islam is still there. She doesn’t remember the house number but she said our neighbours were a Eurasian family and the other was a couple whose wife was Siamese. I remembered one of them had dogs.
I remembered the living room in the house had a semi-circle wall.
I was very young when we stayed there. In fact, I went to the kindergarten near the roundabout. I think it is called Madeleine. I went to the kindy for two years, which means it was in 1967 and 1968. My late eldest brother started Primary One at a school near there but moved to St John’s in 1969 when we moved to the government quarters at Bukit Petaling (behind the Istana Negara). I started Primary One at Convent Bukit Nenas but the family move to JB in May 1969, a week before May 13.
My paternal grandfather passed away in that house in 1967. He was buried at the Muslim Cemetery in PJ.
You were there during that time too?

12:28 AM  
Anonymous anonymous3.49 said...

Every relationship is unique but none is more special than the bond between you and your aunt.I feel privileged to have journeyed with you as you sought to make sense of snippets of your own childhood and where your aunt’s story impacted on you.
She loves you very much, sir.

7:35 PM  
Blogger bergen said...

Fauziah Ismail: The Balai Islam has since undergone 3 major renovations. The latest has turned the masjid into a grand 3 storey mosque, fully airconditioned. It will have a dialysis centre on the ground floor. The multi-purpose hall can accommodate a full-scale wedding. It's a beautiful mosque.

The house you used to stay are still there. Some have been renovated. The curve living room is unique and some owners have kept its original shape as is.

Anonymous 3:49: Yes, you've got it right, she loved me very much.

11:36 AM  
Blogger brighteyes said...

no, i wanted a doll in a crib.i did not bring the shop down n i did not get the doll either!

1:01 PM  
Blogger brighteyes said...

no, i wanted a doll in a crib.i did not bring the shop down n i did not get the doll either!

1:02 PM  
Anonymous binoculars night vision said...

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9:40 PM  

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