Tuesday, October 21, 2008

A Fat Bonus.

Time to write me a fat check, put it in the self-addressed envelope, drop it in the post-box and wait for a couple of days for the postman to come around on his bike to slot the self-addressed envelope in my mail-box. I open the envelope to say to myself wow! a year-end bonus, what a nice way to bring the year to an end even though year-end is a good two months away to go. Who's to stop me from writing me a fat check so I can go to a nice mall to buy me a present to feel good about what a year it has been even though it's any body's guess what's in store for us next year now that stock markets all around us are going down like flies intoxicated by insect spray like Bygone or Ridsect. So while my money is still good as gold, I reckon it's best that I spend it to help lubricate the economy because accountants around me keep telling me you gotta spend money in order to keep the economy going. I don't usually listen to accountants because had it not for their expertise and clever advice, we wouldn't' be in this fine financial mess people say is worse than 1930s depression.
I understand economy just fine. And I don't need no high profile, overseas graduated accountants to tell me how to make money, and how to save money and how to spend it. I learnt from Aunt a simple rule: you make a dollar, keep 70 sen, spend 3o sen. And never buy things on credit. So far this rule works for me just fine but Aunt isn't here no more to tell me not to go into a store selling all kinds of TVs that I'm dizzy with temptations to buy everything in the store including the store clerk who talks non-stop that I'm inclined to wrap him up like a mummy with duct tape. But he's a good store clerks who knows his trade which got me to remind myself to go see his manager to give him a raise because it's very seldom you meet a store clerk who knows his stuff, not to mention very polite.
And I'm thinking of giving away my TVs to a charity home so the old folks there can have a good time watching their favorite programs. As a bonus to my good-hearted angel that I am, I reckon I deserve a 72" LCD TVs with a first class monster cable, and a spanking new DVD player with superb features and a new set of HDMI cable so I can watch the shows crispy clear as melamine free biscuits.
But I'm thinking, do I need a new TVs? Why should I be the guy burden with the responsibility to help lubricate the economy? Why can't the politicians do it instead of me? Now that I'm thinking like this, I see the store clerk talking away like a Greek orator-senator but I can't hear a word he's saying. And so I say to him, lemme go check if my check is fat enough. Otherwise, I'm gonna have to write me another check - a fatter one because a 72" LCD TVs don't come cheap as a kilo of lamb, or a box of muesli cereal.


Anonymous simpleJane said...

dear berg,

i bought a 29" tv last july. was so happy coz i bought myself the biggest ever tv i ever had in my whole entire life, and using my own money summore. soooo happy. sooooo proud. even tho its not a high branded tv, but still i dont owe an ahlong to get it.

but somehow, after coming back from the long eid holidays, my tv went kaput!! now everything on my tv is BLUE!!! seriously, no other colour. imagine if i were to watch smurf on my tv. and it hurts my eyes so bad.

darn! gotta start saving now to buy a new tv. and this time, i'll get me a humble 21" instead. God help me with my mission.

3:23 PM  
Blogger tokasid said...

Salam Bergen:

Good to know you're back Not too late for me to wish you a happy 'Eid.

I am fat and looked fat but ubfortunately I'm never gonna get any fat bonus not from me nor from anyone.

Despite the the economy slowing down( or crashing down?) I don't see any of our so called politician berjiwa rakyat slowing down with their expenditures. They too must have the idea of not trusting the accountants and economists. Never heard any of the ruling politicians worrying about the rise in fuel and goods prices going up like we the rakyat voiced our grouses in the blogs or newspapers or at the warong roti canai. Maybe they are always getting big fat bonuses all year round so they have nothing to worry about.

Ah...the LCD. An elusive hardware neyond my reach.

4:29 AM  
Blogger bergen said...

Simplejane: The 29' TV went down on you a few months after the warranty period? They must have calculated everything that way.

Tokasid: Sama-sama, Doc. How was your Raya? Tak balik Taiping? Malacca now will have Shah Rukh Khan as the ambassador to promote the state. I saw the Rustam guy explain the whole marketing strategy on TV as if the state has come up with a brilliant idea how to go about it without paying millions of dollars in TV commercials. Wow! Didn't they were THAT brilliant. They figured, they must be the only people in the whole who could think of something like that.

Doc, you know politicians. They are snakes of the highest order. LOL

7:52 AM  
Blogger AuntyN said...

While you are at it, please write me a check too. I sure miss a fat bonus now. Hehehe

1:56 PM  
Blogger bergen said...

AuntyN: No problemmmmm...how do you like your check? Rupiah ke Rupee he he

3:44 PM  
Blogger sakmongkol AK47 aka Mat Tomoi said...

Hello..Initially you sounded a bit like Mr.Bean..willing to post a fat cheque to yourself is very funny!The extent you'd go to please yourself is very admirable!Many of us always forget to please ourselves!hehe
Love your entries yang ini and the 'monsoon' punya!Now I know ramai orang Trengganu borak macam MatSalleh.I was thinking tadi.Bergen ni Melayu ke Omputih.Tapi takkan orang bagi salam kat dia!Then bila baca article monsoon tu sahlah!Hehehe..by the way,I'm mamasita.Ni I pakai computer sakmongkol.so keluarlah nama dia jugak.Kitaorang duduk kat Kuantan.Howdy neighbour!

4:39 PM  
Blogger bergen said...

Sakmongkol AK47: Nice to have you here, ma'am. Used to live in Kuantan quite a bit - when Hotel Samudra was one of the places to go to to disco on down with Sam the DJ who'd play your songs because he knows you and you know him. In fact he knows everyone in town he he.

11:18 PM  
Anonymous Percicilan said...

A kilo of lamb and a box of muesli cereal are no longer cheap dahhh. For some households it can be as dear as your plasma tv... :S

7:22 AM  
Anonymous simpleJane said...

p/s : berg, my 29" tv costs me approximately 500 hinggit. adoi... nak kumpul balik 500 hinggit tu, boleh makan setengah tahun provided i posa every isnin and khamis... alahai...

11:48 AM  
Blogger Kata Tak Nak said...

I got meself a 37 inch Viera LCD by force. My son, the brilliant guy that he is got one from some koperasi. After 3 months he couldn't afford the payment coz he quit his job. Yes, dad goes to the rescue and since I am shouldering the burden why should I let him have it in his rented room.
Yes, now I am helping lubricating the economy.
They should give me a Datukship for that.

4:57 PM  

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