It's The Cryin' Season For The Men Of Trengganu.

In Trengganuspeak the above title will sound something like this; piang museng orang llaki nnangis. This has gotta be one of those rare moments when I gotta put on a disguise that I am Norwegian or Irish, and not a guy from Trengganu that I really am. No way I want to be associated with a state where men cry openly as if laughing has gone out of fashion.

Maybe growing up with Aunt has got something to do with it. She put it in my head for as long as I can remember that men don't cry. When they do, they are worth half a man. Which makes them half man half woman. When a man is half man half woman, I once asked, kalau ssetuh batal dok air sembahyang? She would say; budok bertuoh. And Grandma would say; loyar burok budok ni. And then I'd say; batal separuh. And they would laugh so loud everyone would think ours was the house gone crazy since there was no man in the house to monitor the women if they went a little lewd with their jokes.

I can't see what it is that got the men of Trengganu to shed tears now that they've got a new menteri besar. And the sultan is coming home for the week end to ride a horse. The weather is good. The sea is turquoise blue this time of the year, inviting you to go for a dip later in the day, maybe a little after 'Asar prayer. Food is abundance. Women are pretty in their colorful baju kurung. Birds are singing. The clouds are lovely. I don't see why the men of Trengganu must cry when there's so much going for them in the state. They've never before cried for Wang Ehsang that had gone missing. Which is why I don't understand what made them want to do the crying now. I'm here saying to myself; what's wrong with you?

And this Ahmad Said guy is not showing a good example at all. His pictures in the papers today show him crying like a guy who's got his apang dewa* taken by a couple of hungry friends. Not a good start for a leader given the task to take care of a state like Trengganu. Leaders don't cry. Leaders are strong. Like a man. Man don't cry. Men are strong. They don't have tears. They've got blood. And saliva. They fight and they bleed. They get up and they punch and kick. They don't cry because they don't have a woman blood in their vein. Show me a man who cry and I'll slap him so hard he'll be sorry for trying to be funny with me.

Maybe a psychologist will say that there's a bully in me because I like to make fun of men who cry. At school I bullied those who cry easily and I'd go after them until their father had to come deal with me and I'd be in the teacher's room to receive a few whacks on the bottom. After that, I bully again. Just to see them cry so they can call their father. You see, I hate fathers. I hated them because I didn't have one to come deal with the kids who say nasty things about me, about Aunt, about Grandma, about cousin. I hated father because they protect their children when their children cry. And nothing pleases me more than to see boys cry because when I had to cry, no one will ever know...

*Apang dewa: sejenis kuih.