Monday, February 18, 2008

Things They're Gonna Say.

Not that you haven't heard it all before but you can be sure as the sun that they're gonna say it one more time to remind you that long time ago they said the same thing but since you've forgotten about it, they've figured it's about time they say it again now that it's the right time of the year to say it the way they've always said it time and again over the last decades or so.

They're gonna say they can make things better for you. Haven't you had it good the last decades or so? Don't you ever ever forget that. And who made that happen if not this government who has fought ever so hard for your rights to better things in life like good highways, jobs, safe neighborhood, peace, stability, free education for your children, bright future, good life, and all round well-being as a lucky citizen of this lucky nation. So be rational. Vote right. And you know who to vote for. Just in case you don't know, or have forgotten, this is the logo you should vote for. The magical logo that sysmbolizes all the good things in life; fairness, justice and prosperity. This is as good as it gets. It doesn't get any better than this. No one can give this to you.

They're gonna say different thing to different people. They're gonna say we're gonna give you millions in aid to help build more schools for your community. We're gonna give you more money to help fund the programmes to eradicate poverty that has plagued your community since the last time we said something like this. They're gonna say we're gonna work ever so hard to Islamize everything in the country. As a matter of fact, we're having a big seminar on how to do this right now. We've got big guys from Al-Azhar to discuss this. We're working on it, unlike some people who only talk about it but look at the state they are in. We're different. As a matter of fact we've built replicas of the great mosques at a theme park where you can all go visit with your family. We're working on it. And you know we work very hard.

As a matter of fact, if you remember, this is the only time you see them busy working on something as if they've got a plan. As if they've got it all figured out how to develop this country. If you remember, the last five years or so, they've been busy swindling and conniving, stealing and abusing, lying and sucking the country dry. But you know they're not gonna talk about the judiciary system that has been brought down en masse single handedly by a guy who doesn't even recognize himself if he looks him in the mirror. They're not gonna talk about the billions that evaporated into thin air because they say don't worry about it, investors are coming in by the plane loads to flush their petro-dinar right where the free trade zone is gonna be. We've got it all figured out.

And so the citizens are gonna forget what they said five years ago and listen to the things they're saying today. And so the citizens are gonna vote the way they've always voted the last decades or so because the citizens don't remember things too well who said what about anything at all. And so the ciitizens listen to the promises and live to see another five years of abuse. For the next five years the citizens are gonna complain and get mad on things they consider not right. That's what the citizens like to do. They vote and then they complain about the very people they voted in the first place. It goes on and on. And it goes on and on.

Maybe this time it's gonna stop. Who knows? But they're very good at pulling things at the last minute to make things go the way they want to go.

15 Comments:

Blogger k.d said...

That's the difficulty isn't it? Canang-canang here and there about this and that. Promise here and there. How can you know that's it's gonna get done AFTER that person who said those things got voted? And how do you know that the opposition who also promise this and that and whatnot will deliver their promises?

We can never know. But we can try for a new government and see if they will live up to their words. Then when/if they did not, well...then...back to square one lah. Complain je lah...and wait another 5 years...And hope one day a true leader will emerge and save the country.

1:51 AM  
Blogger Kata Tak Nak said...

Look ladies and gentlemen, look at this hat. Its empty isn't it? Now, focus, focus, BEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEENNNNNN. Look, a rabbit! Look a rabbit out of thin air. This is the rabbit that is going to make sure that I will deliver everything that I have promised.

8:04 AM  
Blogger Zawi said...

True, true, true.
They forgot all the unfulfilled promises and are making the same promises again.
The voters are so gullible too, some present of kain pulikat for the men, batik jawa for the ladies, and if you play hard to get some money never fail to do the trick. This is also the time for some agencies to dole out gifts of agricultural inputs to whoever is willing to accept in the hope that a suitable deed be done in return.

8:58 AM  
Blogger bergen said...

K.D: It's like a game that goes on and goes and who knows when all this will come to a stop, if ever it will at all. Like the last election, people are gonna vote the same thing and like the last five years, people are not gonna stop complaining about everything under the blue sky.

I got a feeling the politicians are smarter than a lot of us to know any better that at the end of the day, the people have a good, peaceful life. And that what matters. And since we've never experienced the kinda political turmoil that can disrupt our routine, we've grown to accept this as a blessing and not wanting to take a chance on things. I believe to a lot of people the question on their mind is; is there a real need to take a chance?

Kata Tak Nak: And the people clap clap clap, as if it's they've never seen that kinda trick before. Everyone in the audience has seen that trick time and again but time and again, as if hypnotized, they clap ever the more encouraged by their own loss of memory.

Zawi: Yes, the kain pulikat and kain batik trick works like magic every time they do every five years or so. Maybe the opposition should do the same thing too. Afterall it's a cheap trick to execute and if it works like a charm, why not? What do you think, sir?

10:10 AM  
Blogger cakapaje said...

Salam bro,

Well done! I love this piece and if its part of menu, it goes very well of one of Raja Petra's Heal Thyself.

6:51 PM  
Blogger Zawi said...

Bergen Sir,
The opposition war chest are much smaller than the ruling coalition's. They don't have such mega projects like PKFZ or the like to build up their war chest. Most of their fund are made up of donations from members or persons sympathetic to their cause. There wasn't just enough fund.
During the Pengkalan Pasir BE, some runners who were my ex staff told me they were authorised to pay RM300 for a sure vote. How could the opposition up or even equal that?
I guess pulikat and batik ain't enough gift to get a vote anymore.

10:02 PM  
Blogger bergen said...

Cakapaje: Thank you,sir.

Zawi: Looks like the opposition will never win this game since I don't think they're gonna ever have the kinda money one would need to win in this game. Of course this is what we think based on our calculation. We won't know what Allah has in store.

11:24 PM  
Anonymous Dhahran Sea said...

Bergen, you sure have ways with words... sakit perutlah ketawa reading your piece! I got a couple of hypotheses about why our citizens cepat lupa (& keep voting the same gomen & then complained, and then voted them in again... sickening viscious cycle): (1) because the majority are Melays (as someone said, Melayu mudah luuuupaaaa! Kena gula2 sikit, terus luuuupaaaa!); and, (2)the maggi mee generation - you & I (and rest of our Malaysian citizens who are 6 months old to 50-something) are hooked on the instant noodles, remember? Thirty odd years ago?... the $#@&*% chemicals in the flavorings must have had the effect on our grey matter, and this in turn affected the way we voted over these years!? Maybe its about time to hire some smart-#$%*& legal eagles to sue Nestle&Co. on this? And why not? Those eagles (bald ones, I think?) representing Hindraf are thinking of RMBillions from the Brits! I think we have a better chance of winning! Maybe Tokasid could give his medical views on the case as well?

2:52 AM  
Blogger nadya said...

well said, sir bergen. :)

10:47 AM  
Blogger bergen said...

Dhahran: You're gonna have to start a research to correlate maggi and the way the citizen vote.LOL. Maybe you should meet a couple of guys from Nestle to ask for the research fund and it is also a good idea to tell them right away that if the correlation is caustic, you're gonna sue them for more money. Maybe you wanna consider telling them that you're gonna sue them from the time the they ran the first maggi commercial way back in the 70s. And to make it better, calculate the amount of money you're suing them on daily basis right up to 2008. It's an interesting prospect to make a career out of suing maggi this way. LOL.

10:51 AM  
Blogger bergen said...

Nadya: What a lovely surprise. How are you, ma'am. How's your dad? I hope he's doing good.

10:53 AM  
Blogger Mat Salo said...

Great stuff man. But Kain pulicat or batik jawa is not rashua. They're just gifts. What's rashua is we give the country to politicians to plunder so we can feel pride in voting in sunny Malaysia and go back to watching the feel-good Petronas TV ads. Or Akademi Fantasia even. I therefore absolve the politicians of any wrongdoing. They're smart like you said and are just along for the ride. Blame you, blame me. Blame ourselves. Because believe it or not, this is SUPPOSED to be a democracy.

"The things we do for love..."

(thought it might rhyme with "things they're gonna saya, that's all --but I ain't no poet dude) :)

3:23 PM  
Anonymous Dhahran Sea said...

Haha Bergen, serious, come to think of it, someone got compensated US$millions for suing McD for 'contributing' to his/her obesity (make sure your TV cooking shows use low-cal stuffs!); we have a more serious/meaningful case - the effect of maggi instant noodles on Malaysian citizens' ability to vote meaningfully... anyway, gud to hear you, take care & salam.

3:41 PM  
Blogger tokasid said...

Salam Bergen:

Not only will they tell and promise you of this and that.No. They'll use the govt machinery like Kementerian Penerangan and will broadcast and keep on repeating clips on kelantan and Trengganu. they'll say look,Kelantan is non-progressive.there are lots of Mat Rempits in kelantan.And motocycle theft in Kelantan is the highest and etc,etc.

And look at trengganu. Ah!!In 4 years we transformed Trengganu in a very progressive state.hey previously a small kid had to use the baldi and scoop up water from the well for wudhu' and his Quran teacher is so fierce with her rotan.But now, we provide you with tap water and the Quran classes are so modern that we use multimedia to teach our kids.And didn't you know many mat rempits have quit rempeting and they wanna join our animation classes which is for free and we 'bui elaung' too.

And,no. Don't listen to those ketayaped oppostion telling you Selangor or Johor or Kedah have more Mat Rempit. Or more bohsia.What?Armed robberies? Those are foreigners...not the citizens of Klang Valley or Johorean.
Corruptions? What corruptions? but they were never brought to court. So its heresay.Fitnah only.You know opposition likes to spread fitnah unlike us...we are the victims of fitnah. So please...vote for us again.

Che;gu: Err...I think you made an error during the magic show.Its not rabbit.Its a rat.

Dhahran: most likely there are 2 effects of instant noodles. First: yeah you get mudah lupa to other peoples promises and your promises to others.It works in both ways. The second side effect is some people get SLEEPY easily. Give them a comfortable chair or let them stay in meetings or conferences 15 minutes long and they'll fall ASLEEP.

6:04 PM  
Blogger bergen said...

Mat Salo: You may have resigned to the idea that you're no poet but as far as I'm concerned, your name itself is as poetic a name as an independent stanza.

Dhahran Sea: You've put the idea in my head that maggi and the way we vote are somehow connected and I'm gonna go along with this until it's proven otherwise. LOL.

Tokasid: It's kinda sad they use Trengganu to get at Kelantan but I reckon this is an obvious thing to make a meal of in times like this. It doesn't take a genius to work out the strategy. We'll soon know how far they can get with this strategy, if it's proven to work at all.

They've moved in a step closer with hadhari right into Kelantan with Kok Lanas event that they're organizing. They've run a televsion commercial for this. It shows they mean business.

Let's see how all this play out in the end.

1:22 AM  

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