Friday, March 28, 2008

Things You're Not Supposed To Say.

A lot of people will tell you that it is not nice to tell a guy that the shirt he has on makes him look like an idiot. Which is why a lot of people will politely tell the guy that he has a nice shirt and that he looks like a million buck. They say the right thing. They are being polite and being polite is what it's all about if you want have a lot of friends who will tell you the same thing if you've put on a shirt that can make you look like a bigger idiot. Everyone stays happy this way but in the end no one tells the truth and in the end, you don't even know how to be completely honest with someone. In the end you become such a good liar that you might consider becoming a politician yourself to win an election so you can tell lies professionally.
A woman puts on a dress and she asks you something like this; how do I look? You say; you look very nice. Try say something honest like; you look like a textile factory that got hit by a missile. People usually say something like this in a relationship that's coming to an end. When you've found someone new. And so you say something like this to make her walk out on you so that you won't feel so guilty. When people ask, what happened between you and Elizabeth? You can always say, I don't know what went wrong, she just took off with the new dress that still got a price tag on it. And people are gonna say, ooooh she found someone new. And so you say; I think so too.
A friend introduces you to his new girl, you say; hi, pleased to meet you. She goes to powder her nose and your friend asks you; we're getting married, whaddaya think? You say; well lucky you, she's gonna be a perfect missus for you. Truth is you don't know the woman well enough to make that judgement but you gotta say something nice to make him feel like a million buck. Try say something like this; I don't know, man. She doesn't look like a missus material, the kind who stays home to cook and takes care of the house and the kids. In fact I think she's the type who goes out to party at ever little chance she has.
Try say something like that. Chances are your friend is gonna say, you get the hell outta my life.
People can't deal with the truth. That's the truth. People can deal with lies but people are not very good at dealing with the real thing. Which why I believe I've burnt a couple of bridges this week when I said the things I wasn't supposed to say. These are among the things I said:
'I don't think you have what it takes to be in this business.'
'Lemme tell you before we go further, I think your proposal doesn't make any sense. In fact I believe you don't know what you're doing.'
'How much money you've got?'
'No, a loan will only mean you're gonna have to re-pay it even before you receive the first check from your first invoice.'
'Why don't you sell your car and downgrade to a cheaper one before you make any money from this business.'
'You're gonna have to give up your high society lifestyle for at least two years'
'I don't think your missus is cut out for the kinda life this business will have on you.'
'I don't think you are meticulous enough to be in this business.'

10 Comments:

Blogger zackzara said...

It takes strength to tell the truth when lies would be more convenient, but it takes strength to tell lies when the truth would hurt the most..but then, its the truth that matters.

1:55 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Politicians never lie, they just tend to misquote all the time.

5:45 AM  
Blogger Kata Tak Nak said...

Lies hurt, but then we lie so as not to hurt. We lie to be polite. We lie to get into a relationship. We lie to get out of a relationship. I wonder what would happen to us if we are incapable of lying?

6:31 AM  
Blogger cakapaje said...

Salam Bro,

Diluah mati ayah, ditelan mati ibu; caught in a deadly situation above, the best way is to tell the truth, no matter how it hurts.

As for learning the art of business, the best way is to burn your fingers. But make sure you have a cushion to jump on. Or, if pushed into the deep end, make sure there's a truly qualified life guard on duty and not like that cakapaje who only learned the basics and have forgotten it altogether now! :)

Take bro, in whatever decision you choose.

11:04 AM  
Blogger Mek Na said...

once a friend told me this..."over here in our society people cant accept the fact when someone's being sincere to them" a kind of living in a denial syndrome. only hear what they like to hear. OMG jgn la i jd one of them!!

1:18 PM  
Blogger bergen said...

Zackzara: Honesty is the best policy.

Anonymous 5.45am: Snakes of the highest order. That's who they are. LOL.

Kata Tak Nak: We lie our way in, and we lie our way out. When the truth comes out, it's gonna hurt even more.

Cakapaje: Jump in is the best way to go. Nevermind about the lifeguard. One has gotta learn not depend on anyone except oneself. I learnt the art of business from the women of Trengganu - one of them was Aunt. LOL.

1:20 PM  
Blogger bergen said...

Mekna: We decide what we want do, who we wanna be.

1:21 PM  
Anonymous podgykat said...

What's that they say about being cruel to be kind? ;)

5:08 PM  
Blogger Mek Na said...

well said sir..a'ah we decide who we wanna be

11:23 PM  
Anonymous Dhahran Sea said...

Salam Bergen. Its a real pain in the neck, telling the truth sometimes, I mean. I suppose at times one has to do a mental "cost benefit analysis"... will the pros from telling the truth outweigh the cons? Not an easy task...

12:17 AM  

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