Monday, January 19, 2009

Stand By Your Hubby, Ma'am. (Edited)

YOU MAY WANNA TAKE A CHANCE on a guy who says nice things about you in the morning when you run into him in the elevator, or on the way to your cubicle in a nice downtown corporate office where you keep a picture of your family next to your computer. You may wanna forget about your uneventful life for a moment and take a chance on love one more time because the love you thought that would see you thru' the old age doesn't look good anymore now that your hubby is all rotund and doesn't know the difference between the new dress you bought yesterday or the one you bought two years ago. As a matter of fact, you figure, he hardly notices anything about you anymore and so you figure, a colleague who says nice things about you and your new dress is as good as it can get to putting the fire back on the kinda love you want to happen again and again. You figure you wanna be sixteen again and it's time you deserve something for yourself that you're willing to drop everything and listen to your heart and start flirting a little with the colleague.

Or you wanna take a chance on a guy you met on Facebook, or Tagged or one of those network thing. And so you exchange email messages and the next thing you know, you give him your cellphone number and things start to snowball from there faster than a one-legged marathon runner going downhill.

You may think your hubby doesn't appreciate you anymore. You may think this in your head each day you wake up. You may start to speculate that he doesn't like you anymore, or that he doesn't care about you anymore

You're wrong.

The truth is he cares. It's just that he doesn't say much about it because he figures he's got his life in order now that you have become so much a part of him, and that everything is so stable to him on the home front that he doesn't have to remind himself to say little things like 'You look good today, honey!' or 'God, I love you so much I'd kill anyone who look at you with half an eye.'

Now, a stranger will say nice things to you and you figure he means it. Lemme tell you this, ma'am. A stranger doesn't mean it because he doesn't know anything about you. He sees you in a nice dress with make-up, nice shoes and all. He doesn't have to see you in your birthday suit (whatever that is), at home doing your chores, running errands and stuff like that.

A stranger says this thing to you because he knows a 40 something woman like you can easily be taken in with something like this because he knows your hubby doesn't say it anymore.

Don't take a chance on a stranger, ma'am. You wanna stand by your hubby at home because I bet you my left arm and my right ear that your hubby will be one confused guy if he has to live his life without you. He'd go bonkers in a week because you are not there to organize his life for him. You see, he has given up his entire life so you can take care of it for him. He doesn't control his life anymore. You do. So when you take a chance on a stranger and run away in a boat to some paradise in the sun, you know you're leaving behind a hubby who will go down in 5 days top.

Think about it, ma'am. Stand by your hubby because he's as good as it will ever get to true love. So when you leave the office for home today, think for a second that you're going home to a guy who has surrendered his life in your hand. He may not say nice things like; you're-one- drop-dead-gorgeous-woman, but you can bet your nose that he's there to share the only life he knows with you. You don't want him to say something like this; 'You're one gorgeous thing, woman'. You know you're not one gorgeous thing yourself anymore, so don't kid yourself. So when a stranger says 'You're one gorgeous thing,' you know very well that it's a big lie.

Stand by your hubby, ma'am. It's the best bet there is.


Blogger mamasita said...

very entertaining and delightful!I was grinning all the way while enjoying it.Mujurlah my son didn't notice.
He would have surely asked "Are you ok Ma?"hahaha

4:46 PM  
Blogger ina said...

Dear Sir,

What can I say, it's entertaining as always...hehehe...

6:48 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

and i thought i was reading my story the other way round, haha..and i was so enchanted with the first guy that gave me all the compliments and said all the nice things about me after the split, my councellor..

6:52 PM  
Blogger An-Nimr said...

Salam bergen,

Sorry to melencong. Would appreciate you tolong war2kan this petition to your blog guests to sign.

9:23 PM  
Blogger An-Nimr said...


Wanna take the plunge and take a chance?

9:25 PM  
Blogger An-Nimr said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

9:25 PM  
Blogger farah said...

Thx Mr.B - i needed this.

10:23 PM  
Blogger Fi-sha said...

Dear En Bergen,
that sounds familiar to me by changing your title to "Stand by your wife, Sir". Being a single lady, at my age, attracts unwarranted attention seeking husbands of other women. It is sad to notice that some married couples are surviving on the fact that they have kids, not genuine feelings.

En Berge, why cant they make good of their marriage? I wonder...

11:01 PM  
Blogger Kama At-Tarawis said...

fuuuulamak! thisa is a very kau-kau piece of of writing... tabiklah! btw berg, I memang sayang pun that rotund, occasionally irritating, sometimes a little deaf (or pretend to be), but most times loveable fellow..LOL

11:03 PM  
Anonymous zara said...

Salam Sir,

I like this post, and I think you can universalize the title coz sometimes when the wife stands by the hubby, the hubby is facing 2/3/4 other ladies invisible to the wife's view...perhaps bcoz of the hubby is in prosperous condition so she cant view who's standing/leaning beside his hubby... it happens tho.

But really, I like this one. So when men says nice things or compliment me ... I should not take it on face value, rite? Ok..noted :)

1:16 AM  
Blogger Fauziah Ismail said...

Salam Bergen
This piece is reassuring to the husbands but the wives I believe need to sometimes be reassured too.
As much as the wives can be taken in by the attention of men either in reality or the cyber-world, the husbands can easily be swayed, too.
As much as the wives have to stand my their hubbies, it would be worth getting this message out to the hubbies too.

11:12 AM  
Blogger bergen said...

Mamasita: Glad to entertain you with this entry, ma'am.

Ina: Thank you, ma'am.

Anonymous:6:52pm: I'm sorry to hear about the split, ma'am.

An-Nimr: I've written about Gaza but not sure if I should publish it. The entry talks about Shia'ah and Sunni.

An-Nimr: LOL

Farah: You're welcome, ma'am.

Fi-sha: I believe you know how to deal with it, ma'am.

Kama-At-Tawaris: LOL, I bet you do, ma'am. Salam to Haji. Bila dok tahu boleh jjuppa nok ajok makang kerepok.

Zara: I believe I owe you the reverse entry.

Fauziah Ismail: I hear you, ma'am. Will get to work on the reverse entry right away.

3:03 PM  
Blogger Desert Rose said...

Dear Bergen,

Oh how i want to believe everything u said, but in real life, sometimes it doesnt happened that way..

Most of the times when a husband is not paying attention to his wife is because he is somebody else he is paying attention to.

And this is one of the silent criteria any woman should take into precaution, when ur man is only notice ur new hair cut 2 months after or that u got to repeat ur self again and again when he is watching tv (yelah tu tgk tv , berangan adala)then start looking for other clues.

Sorry, but need to be a little more cautious these days sebab ramai Memey Suhaiza's clon out there. (Sounds pretty unsecure am I??)

5:01 PM  
Blogger An-Nimr said...

bergen,post la pasai Gaza tu.

anyway, the most important is for muslims to stick together.

we have to remember that the divides are also being perpetuated by the Zionists dan yang sewaktu dengan mereka.

12:19 PM  
Anonymous Liza said...

Hahaha!!! Congratulations!

Good posting with good in depth analysis of the situation. In reality, many wives out there who are promiscuous (especially career women). Like in Lipstick Jungle. It happens in real life too. But again, it happens to both parties, i.e. husbands too are unfaithful.

Can't seem to find anyone who is truthful to their relationship anymore. Sigh...

3:22 PM  
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3:34 AM  
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