Sunday, November 18, 2007

Feelin' Like An Intellectual.

Don't ask me when was the last time I've read this many books in my life that this whole thing is making me feel as if I am an intellectual ever ready to disagree with anything I can think of in a conversation with campus folks who's got glasses thicker than magnifying glass. I know I got things under control. In fact I believe no one knows better than me how dangerous this little knowledge can do to myself if I don''t keep things in check. Who knows I might end up like one of those intellectuals who disagree with everything people say that in the end they've got no friends to turn to when they need a 20 sen coin to pull off a trolley at Carrefour.
Which is why I've stopped reading for a while. I'm taking a break from reading for a few hours to give myself a perspective that the world doesn't evolve around books alone. Neither does the world evolve around how smart you think you are, or how much knowledge you think you've got in your head just because you've read all the thick books in the library. I know better and I ain't gonna lie to myself that I may have read a lot of books thicker than a piece of brick but damned if I know the meaning of the big words they've got written in them. In fact I'm starting to have the impression that people who wrote those thick books are quite troublesome to the world since they can't explain their thinking in simple sentences so people like me can understand better what in the world they are trying to say.
I haven't yet the skill to skim the layers and layers of big sentences with equally big words to get to the real thing so I can just go home and say, oh this guy's hungry and all he wants is a sandwich and coffee. But instead, the guy writes something like this:
The form in which his life-story comes to us is intensively mediated: through his own fame and astute sense of publicity, his meticulously rearranged autobiographies, the accretion of subsequent commentary, and the inflections lent by his combative attitude to life.
I tried telling myself to keep going, don't give up. Try to understand. Check the dictionary. But after checking the dictionary for more than 29 times to finish up a page, I said to myself; maybe this ain't the kinda life you wanna to pursue, mate. Maybe you're meant for the grease and diesel and saltwater and oil rig and not this diabolical thing you think you can handle called, intellectual. But I know better. I don't wanna go back to the rig. I've had enough of that kinda life. I don't wanna deal with fire no more. All I wanna do is to learn a thing or two so I can be as smart as everyone else around me. Like those people who can express their opinion with words that work so well with what they're thinking.
I'm going back to my books.

8 Comments:

Blogger Kata Tak Nak said...

The people who invented books, certificates and degrees are sadistic bastards. Life is hard enough as it is and now they add books.

Anyway I was lucky coz besides those dry voluminous linguistic bullshit books that we had to read, part of our course requirement was to cover quite a number novels, some poems, dramas and plays. That made life a little bit bearable.

11:54 AM  
Blogger Zabs said...

Salam Bergen,
Maybe what the writer's goal is, to make you confuse, if you are, then he had acheived his goal.

3:08 PM  
Blogger k.d said...

Mr.Bergen

Ah..thick thick books..and all those jargons. I remember pouring over them late at nite trying to memorise the nerves and blood supply, the muscles and whatnot.

Keep at it...you'll be alraight.

4:51 PM  
Blogger tokasid said...

Salam Bergen:

Books...I'm okay with horror, thrillers and most lightweight books( and they really are light weight in content and weight).Sometimes certain stories about old China always fascinates me.
Autobiography doesn't appeal to me, but the few that I read were very interesting namely: Mao Tze Tung, The Last Emperor and Road to Mecca by Muhammad Asad.
( at the moment am reading Growing up in Trengganu by our own Awang Goneng....it had big words. Big Trengganuspeak words which is big for guys not from Ganu).

I rarely read anything more than 400pages. And anything academic(except certain medical articles or journals, you have to keep in touch with the changes in your fields right?)

Poems....I'm just blind and deaf about them ,be it in English or Bahasa malaysia. Just couldn't understand the 'maksud tersirat'.

Anyway, GUIT had finally become a book. We are waiting for yours now, the episodes of Dungun, Penang and living with Aunty.

6:40 PM  
Anonymous kl_gal said...

My untested theory: The more bombastic and meaningless the words, the more insecure and clueless the author. As the saying goes " If you can't bedazzle them with brilliance, befuddle them with bullsh*t" :))

11:44 AM  
Blogger cakapaje said...

Salam bro,

Hmm...huh? Oh! Hehehe...I'm just being naughty tonight. But, have to agree with everybody. Now, where's that encyclopedia britanica of mine...? :)

1:14 AM  
Blogger bergen said...

Kata Tak Nak: Sadistic bastards (LOL) Those are might strong words to describe those poor fellas. LOL. You made my day. Gosh, I will never look at books the same way again.

Zabs: Confusion is the name of the game.

K.D: Oh oh, please don't ask me to memorize words more than 3 syllables. LOL

Tokasid: Awang Goneng writes better than native speakers. And with class, wits and intelligence. I'm his biggest fan. Wish I could write like him. But it's a long time coming I would be able to do that.

kl_gal: I agree because people with confidence don't have to hide behind big words. That's why a lot of people with confidence are easy to deal with compared with those who got things to hide.

Cakapaje: Encyclopedia? Whoa, lol I'm outta here. LOL

11:15 AM  
Blogger thefoundergen said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

6:21 AM  

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