Monday, February 06, 2006

To My Norwegian, And Australian, Buddy.

You can always depend on your Norwegian friend to fight on your side if ever you suddenly get into a brawl for no reason other than, it's-so-quiet-in-here-let's-have-a-bit-of-punch-up. Same thing goes with an Australian mate. You can depend on him to come to your rescue when you are up against two Cypriots drunk as skunks, especially when the fight wasn't going your way because you had miscalculated what these two could do with their elbows. The Australian buddy would join the party out of nowhere, half drunk himself, took a big swing at the Cypriots and he got them on the floor faster than you could figure out the meaning of life. After that he'd wink at you and say, you alright, mate?

Out of respect for their sense of comradeship, you too want to show your Norwegian, or Australian, friend that they too can count on a Malaysian friend to fight on their side should they suddenly find themselves in a brawl, which is quite frequent, usually over something big such as he doesn't like the other guy's shoes, or the cap. You sit quietly in a corner and your friend is at the bar to take his drink, chatting up a girl and before you know it a guy comes up from behind to push your Norwegian, or Australian, friend. He starts to talk tough. Your friend looks up trying to figure out what just hit him. Before you could even give your eyes half a blink, a fight breaks out. A few guys join in to beat your friend. You don't think. You just run towards the bar to join the fight. You jump with a front kick hoping it will land on someone's jaw. It doesn't. You fall to the floor. A guy comes in to give you a kick. He's got his leg up, leaving the other on the floor. You give him a quick jab to the knees. He falls down. You hear kneecap comes off. And you get excited. You want to hear more bones broken. You get up. You have the advantage. These guys are tall giving you a clear opening for a nice shot to the jaw, and the nose. You receive a blow to the ear, knocking your sense off balance long enough to keep you swaying like a coconut tree during a severe monsoon. You can't use locks in this type of fight because the arms move like rotor blades that it's almost impossible for you to grab one for a good lock that can dislodge the joint. So you just keep punching and punching and punching until you wake up to find yourself in a clinic, nose bleeding, ears ringing. A pretty nurse looks you in the eye and you feel half your nose is missing and it's painful even to breathe because it feels as if someone has ripped off your nose with a wrench and poured turpentine on it so it sizzled like steaks on charcoal fire.

I hope to meet up with you guys one of these days. If you happen to be reading this blog, which I doubt, do email me right away. It's me, The Scrooge. Aramco 1989. I am so lonely trying to get used to the idea of making a living on land, and not smell of saltwater, sweat, grease, and diesel.

8 Comments:

Blogger anedra said...

Scrooge?? There's gotta be a story behind the name..let us in on it?? Take care Bergen. I hope u recover from your "rig"-sickness soon! It'll be nice to hook up with old friends though, yes?

4:47 PM  
Blogger LifeBloom said...

Hang in there Berg. I am also hanging by a thread here. Miss the mountains and swamp very much.

5:46 PM  
Blogger ereen said...

after all the hypes that r going on now...i doubt very much to even consider norwegian as a friend...nevertheless..i think we should always depend on ourselves (of course with the help of GOD) to change for the better..no one will help u, if u don't help ur self first...anyway good luck..n cheer up!

5:52 PM  
Blogger AuntyN said...

Take care my friend, we are all here for you.

Btw, how's the book coming, when can I cash in on the royalty for the original idea for "Bila Larut Malam"? :-).

5:54 PM  
Blogger Noni said...

NOT that I have ever been in one but I heard that there's nothing like a bar-room brawl to get the anedralin pumping... and I also HEARD that bungee jumping comes close... so I HEARDlah kan...

5:59 PM  
Blogger bergen said...

Anedra: I hope the next entry will explain how I got this nick.

Lifebloom: Mountains and swam? Where are these exactly, ma'am?

Ereen: We didn't hit off in a day as friends. It took some time before we finally became good friends. He maybe Norwegian and his country may be punished for publishing the cartoons but before all this, he and I were friends and I reckon we shall remain friends. Being in the industry where accidents are common, I give it a 50-50 chance that he's still out there somewhere if he isn't dead in a petroleum fire.

AuntyN: I am going to try to write down 'Bila Larut Malam' tonight and see how far I can go with this title. Maybe tomorrow or the day after I will go see Mr Editor to see if it's any good for publication. And then we can talk money. Deal, my friend?

Noni: It's scary because you know it won't end eventhough the other guy is on the floor bleeding in the nose like a broken gas pump. A friend of his might have left the place unnoticed to summon his entire clans. An experienced barroom brawler will only leave in a squad car, spend a night in jail, pay the fine @ RM50.00 per punch.

Not in a million years will I ever give it a try bungee jumping. That scares me spineless, man.

7:10 PM  
Blogger Noni said...

U should try it... but beware that u tuck ur shirt either into ur pants or into the harness if u don't want ur appendages to be dangling and exposed for all the world to see when ur hanging up-side down. Oops u don't have those appendages methinks...

9:47 PM  
Blogger LifeBloom said...

Berg - Mount Kinabalu & Kelias mangrove swamps in Sabah respectively.

9:25 AM  

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