Oh! Those Fine Nurses Of Assunta.

Gotta remind myself to check straight into Assunta just in case I'm down with fever or a minor cold. Gotta meet up those fine, friendly and helpful nurses they've got there. Oh! those fine nurses at Assunta, wish every nurse in the world is like that.

Don't go thinking the hospital pay me to write this. No one in his or her right mind would want me to do that. Not with the way I write, or the way I spell the words out. A fine establishment like Assunta deserves a polished write up the way Awang Goneng is capable of, or Count Byron. When will I be able to write like these guys, or think like them. Maybe I gotta read up a lot more books but I know this is not possible because I am not much of a reading kinda guy. I can tough it out to finish up a page or two but I don't think I can pull it through for a third. I'd rather you have me do the laundry for three days than try to read up a book. But it's a totally different story if the book is about how to sharpen your carbon steel knives, or how to de-bone a chicken to butterfly it for a good roast. I can handle these kinda books pretty well. But give me a book with a lot of words and no pictures in it and you can bet half your head that I'd be on the couch looking as if I've just gave birth to a triplet after completing a 20 km marathon. I betcha.

Now the Assunta nurses.

I was there to see a friend but after running into a couple of nurses in the hallway on the way to the room where my friend was in, I forgot all about who it was I was supposed to see. In fact I almost forgot who my friend was, or what his name was. For a while he didn't figure in the bigger scheme of things because I was too busy being polite to every single nurse I ran into. The way I figured, I could be polite to them for a week on end and I knew it would do me a lot of good like lower my blood pressure, or cholesterol or free radicals or whatever I got in the body that made me kinda worried every now and then.

After a few hellos, and afternoon, ma'am, I finally found the room where my friend was and I saw how badly he needed a rest and so I said, you'd better get back to rest, I gotta go, bye. And so I was out of the room before he could even open his eyes and I didn't feel guilty leaving him all alone with the wires connected to his body because I was on a mission important to the nation. There were so many nurses to meet and try to get to know them and learn up their names by heart to ask whether they were hungry and would care for something to eat since I got a bit of money to spend and who better to spend it on other than the fine nurses of Assunta. All of a sudden I feel like moving in there as a permanent resident but I knew better that wouldn't be possible because you've gotta be at least one leg less to get in here. I know a heart attack would get you straight in but what's good is a heart attack when you would be busy trying to keep your heart working to stay alive and they'd connect you with wires and put on the oxygen cup in your mouth big as a bowl that you won't be able to see the nurses moving about your bed because they've gotta to keep you alive so you can pay your bills when you come around.

Gotta figure out a way, maybe get myself a class 3 fever. You know the kind mild enough to knock you off a little but not too strong to knock you off completely that you would be completely unconscious to know what's going on around you. Or I could go in to do a physical and hope they crowd around me so I can feel what it's like to be a James Bond for an hour or so but I wouldn't wanna do this on account that they might find something is wrong with me that they may want to put me down for a week and connect all the wires up and put the oxygen mask the size of a flower pot.

I got a plan.